When the Irish say that St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland, what they don't tell you is that he was the only one who saw any snakes!
Paddy was shaving when he knocked the mirror off the shelf and it fell to the floor and it cracked across the middle. Paddy gazed in horror. 'Bejabbers, I've cut my throat,' he gasped.
"Ah, good morning, Mrs. Murphy, and how is everything?"
"Sure and I'm having a great time of it between my husband and the fire. If I keep my eye on the one, the other is sure to go out."
Finnegans wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning him. "Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant. "She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said Finnegan.
Two farmers were driving their tractor down the middle of a country road. A car comes around the corner backs hard to avoid them , skids, tumbles twice and land in a field. Jimmy say to Eamonn it's just as well we got out of that field.
O'Connell was staggering home with a small Paddy in his back pocket when he slipped and fell heavily. Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running down his leg.
"Please, God," he implored, "let it be blood!"
Why did God invent whiskey? So the Irish would never rule the world.
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Topic: ~~~Happy St. Paddy's Day~~~ (Read 6563 times)